Who suggests premarital counseling for someone who's currently going through marriage counseling

Who suggests premarital counseling for someone who's currently going through marriage counseling 🤣 

                                         

                                                            Click here to see full story

                                                             Watch full episode here

                                                        

 He loves cars. That’s the first thing you notice about him. You show him one, and his eyes light up. He’s growing up so fast—I can’t even take my eyes off him for one second. “Nope,” someone said to me, laughing, “you won’t be able to.” But life isn’t all sweet moments. Amid the joy, deeper conversations find their way in. Someone asked, “Have you talked to Anthony about how counseling’s going?” I had. It’s been an emotional rollercoaster for him. Some days he’s cheerful, even excited, which honestly feels a little odd given that it’s divorce counseling. Other days, he’s down, moving through the house like a shadow. I can’t always tell what’s happening in those sessions, but I hope whatever it is, it’s pushing him closer to closure and healing. That’s when the real suggestion came—one I wasn’t expecting. “You know, it might be a good idea for you and Anthony to look into counseling together. Kind of like premarital counseling.” That threw me. “In the middle of his divorce counseling? Isn’t that overkill?” But she didn’t flinch. She shared how when she and Dad got together, they didn’t have anything like that. No structured guidance. No deep conversations about how to handle conflict. They just dove in and figured it out as they went. But now, with hindsight, she sees the cracks that could have been avoided. “When you really start to evaluate the person you're with—how they handle drama, how they solve conflict—that’s something you want to know early. Maybe if Anthony and Amber had done premarital counseling, they wouldn’t be here.” It made me pause. I’d never thought of it like that. But now, as things get more serious between Anthony and me, maybe it is smart to start laying the foundation for a healthier relationship. “But why would he agree to that now?” I asked. “Isn’t that something we should do after the divorce?” 

                                                           

 She gently pushed back, saying that we both have trauma to work through. It’s been a long road for both of us. Why not try to heal together? That’s when another voice chimed in. “I don’t think it’s a good idea. I’m just listening here.” “Why not?” someone challenged. “Counseling is for families too. And we are a family.” That sparked a whole different energy. Suddenly, my relationship with Anthony was under the microscope, and so was everyone else’s. “Maybe you need to go to counseling,” someone shot back. “I’ve been before,” came the reply. “But come on, premarital counseling with a man who’s still married?” “He won’t be married forever,” I responded. “We’re going to be together. So why not start building now, before bad patterns set in?” Someone agreed. “Exactly. That could save Kai from a lifetime of heartache.” But not everyone saw it that way. “With a married man?” she snapped. “Go ahead if that’s what you want. But it sounds like you’re missing the bigger picture. Maybe because you don’t have a relationship—or even a boyfriend.” That stung. Then came the sarcasm. “Maybe we just need to get her on a date.” “I’m busy,” she shot back. “You’re worried about the wrong things.” “We’re worried about making our family work,” I told her. “Go ahead. Do whatever you want,”

                                                              

 she said. “But I don’t think it’s a good idea.” And there it was again. The judgment. The divide. One side trying to hold the family together. Another pointing out the cracks. Everyone had an opinion—especially the ones not in the situation. “Nothing’s ever a good idea,” she scoffed. “But living with a man? That’s excellent.” “It sure was,” someone replied. “Or… is.” Closing Thoughts: Family conversations are rarely simple. They’re layered with history, emotion, and unspoken expectations. This one brought up real questions about timing, love, healing, and support. Is it wrong to work on a relationship before it’s "official"? Or is it actually the smartest move we can make? What do you think? Can love and healing run side by side, even if the timeline isn’t traditional?